Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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