I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She bit a glass in half.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
