Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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