season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.