Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.