Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize