Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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