One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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