I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
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