I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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