If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
