Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize