So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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