No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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