"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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