If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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