I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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