She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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