Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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