dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
