the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
How does it feel to date your dad?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize
