i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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