Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
