this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize
