Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize