Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
