And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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