We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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