Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Randomize
