She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
