hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
