I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
