Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT