I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
