If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
