i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize