We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize