Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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