Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
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