Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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