oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize