I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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