bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
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