i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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