guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
