dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize