Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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