i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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