Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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