Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
