Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
