Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
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